Its that time of year which I hate anyway without the extra pressure of Loftex hanging over everything. No, I don’t hate Christmas per se, just some of the associated tasks like shopping, and (shudder) writing the cards.
Started tonight. Because of the relatives on the other side of the globe we need to kick this off early, though we never beat the wee girls in my daughter’s social circle who exchange about 50 of the smallest (but cutest!) cards each and therefore have to start in November as their writing isn’t otherwise going to be fast enough to complete the task by boxing day.
I always write the same crap cliche sentences, no matter what my intentions for the rest of the year. This is simply because when confronted with a blank card all parts of the English language bar ‘Hope all is well with you. We are all fine though S continues to grow and amaze us all ….’ disappear from the brain. I find myself creating material I too guffawed at when Simon Hoggart collated it in his books and columns on Christmas round robin letters.
But this year of course the sin is compounded by it being a lie! Things aren’t fine with us! I’m trapped in the last days of a criminal conspiracy which threatens to destroy me professionally and financially! I want to kill certain individuals and toss their entrails to the festive Christmas vultures!
Its traditional of course not to use that kind of language in cards which may be why the brain screens it out when you’re writing them.
Meanwhile Roger’s given us all cards in the office to send to all our clients and channels. Again, we’re all poised, pen in hand, wondering what to write.
‘Goodbye, sorry about the mess, love from all the gang at Loftex4′?
‘We know you’re a charity supporter as you sent us an Oxfam card last year – please send money to the Save Loftex4 Appeal this year’?
‘Aaaaaaaaarrrrrggggghhhhhh’?
Suggestions on a (Christmas) card please.
